How to Encourage Your Adult Children in Their Faith Walk

Quick Summary: Watching adult children navigate their own faith journey can bring pride and, at times, worry, but there’s plenty parents can do to offer gentle encouragement. Praying for them, leading by example and noticing small signs of faith can go a long way. Giving them time to grow at their own pace and talking about faith without forcing the conversation respects their independence.

1. Pray for Them

You have many people to include in prayers, but your children likely receive a lot of time when you’re talking to God. Praying for them in general can help them and you. If you’re focusing on their faith walk, pray about that journey specifically. Asking God to guide your adult children can make a difference while making you feel peace that you’re handing it over to God.

2. Lead by Example

Focusing on your walk with God gives your adult children an example to follow. You don’t have to talk about your faith or journey directly. Simply by focusing on your faith, you’re leading by example. Your adult children might see how your beliefs make your life more fulfilling and peaceful. They might start to follow your lead in little ways that eventually lead to big changes.  

3. Rethink Your Perspective

Shifting the way you think about the situation can make it easier to handle. For instance, you might be focusing on what your children aren’t doing. Maybe they’re not going to church or praying regularly. Instead, look for little things they are doing that show their faith. Perhaps they serve the community regularly through volunteering or listen to Christian music in the car.

It can also help to accept that your adult children simply need to figure out things for themselves. Questioning their faith or stepping away from the church for a little while doesn’t mean they’re abandoning their faith completely. They might need to walk this path of questioning things to end up in a place of stronger faith. Instead of pushing harder, try stepping back and supporting them where they are, knowing it could eventually make them love God even more.

4. Find New Ways to Serve Your Children

When your kids are younger, you know how to serve them. You might take them to practices, drop them off at friends’ houses and cook them meals. You set rules and boundaries to help them learn how to be responsible, faithful adults. When they become adults, your role shifts. Finding new ways to serve them shows them you’re still there and allows you to fulfill the need to serve. It also respects their independence and encourages them to make decisions on their own.

You can do this simply by asking what would be most helpful to them. If your adult child has kids of their own, that might mean offering to watch your grandchild for a few hours each week to let your child and their partner have time alone. A child who’s in college might appreciate homemade goodies sent to their dorm or gift cards to local restaurants for a break from the cafeteria. Serving your children in a meaningful way that doesn’t feel overbearing can encourage them to serve others.

5. Give Them Time

Remember that life doesn’t happen on your preferred timeline. Your adult child might need time to question their faith and experience more things in life before they fully embrace God. They might go through a rebellious phase where they stop going to church. Once they start on a faith journey, it might be slower than you want. Look for small signs of progress and let yourself find hope in those moments. Know that the faith journey is very personal and doesn’t follow the same trajectory for every person. This is the path your adult child needs to walk, so let it unfold naturally and at the speed they need.

6. Talk About Faith Without Forcing

Keeping faith as a focus in your life can plant seeds in your adult children’s minds. You might share experiences about your faith walk to encourage them and create a legacy of faith. Talking about a news story related to religion could get the conversation going. You might share a favorite Bible passage or religious quote to encourage them to share their thoughts.

You can also use social media and current popular trends to connect with them over faith. For instance, you might share a post you see on social media that relates to faith. Sharing a clip of a Christian comedian or sending them a Christian song you love could also nudge them toward their faith walk.

7. Maintain Your Faith in God

Your adult children may not embrace their faith as quickly as you hoped. They might question God or stray from the church. It’s important to maintain your faith in God through those times. Find comfort in your own faith and in God, and believe he has a plan for your children. Staying strong in your faith helps you remain patient while your children figure out their faith.